05.17.05 (11:44 pm) [edit]
Irony is such an amazing thing. As I was browsing thru the web last night I happened upon an old post from like 2 years ago. It was after a few people I knew "virtually" had a huge spat and had hurt eachother. I have very few moments of brilliance, but when I re-read this last night I giggled about how history repeats itself.. even in such a forum as this. I musta been on some good drugs when I wrote this *whew* Do the Dew or maybe I just had a Brunette moment
In life, people can't make us feel or do things that we don't allow them to. Our decisions are our own. ie: You can't make me angry , but I can choose to be angry. No one can make me happy but myself, nor is it anyone elses job to do so.
So my advise... Dont give people that power over you...No matter what the situation. Be responsible for your own feelings and actions.
The internet has some great feature called ignore and delete! right click the names of those you don't want to communicate with and block them...delete an unpleasant response..this allows you to continue your communications with the people who you do care about without the fuss of those you don't. *I am still searching for the real life version of this feature*
A few thoughts on virtual interaction. It would be my opinion that alot of us place way too much stock in what gets said online sometimes, and things get blown out of proportion. I often wonder if these were real life situations, how differently would we handle them?? Do we verbalize our opinions of each other in front of large crowds at the grocery?? Do we voice our dislikes about people based on thier physical appearance or our first impressions in the lobby of a movie theatre? Do we judge people and react accordingly without knowing anything more about them then how they look from a distance? When we fight and argue with people, do we do it loud and proud in the middle of a parking lot?? My guess is, not many do. When we hear someone has said something untrue or has said something about us..do we automatically make that person guilty without first going to them privatly to verify it?? Rumors kill alot of potentially wonderful friendships.
I am speaking as someone who is often judged by people who have no clue what I am about. I could come out on front street and lay peoples business bare for the world to see..but what is the point? There would be none, except maybe to appear weak and unable to handle critisism or to demonstrate an inability to not personalize things when I know they aren't true. Or maybe the point would be to try to belittle someone to make myself appear to be a better person then the one offending me? This is not the way I choose to react, no matter how hurtful the words or situation. And I wonder why sometimes people stoop to the level of the person doing the offending?? Don't give anyone that power over you! *sticks and stones....but names will never hurt me* Childhood song... lifetime lesson!
I have friends who have said to me. "Wow you are nothing like I thought." Makes me wonder what it is they thought *lol*
There are alot of us who share our souls online in one form or another. If we took a poll, my guess is that each of us has a different reason for being here, whether it is boredom at work or a lack of oportunity to be out in the real world or whatever. The internet is awesome because it does take away some of the stereotypical happenings of reality and tends to give people the confidence to say things or behave in ways they wouldn't in normal life situations. This is an incredible thing. The shy become confident and the bold become bolder. We do need to remember that behind each name lies a real soul. A person with feelings and a life. A life which can be wonderful or miserable. Chat is a huge melting pot of society, and I personally LOVE that. I have met awesome people that under a world without internet, I never would have had the opportunity to get to know. For that I am thankful !!
Maybe we should spend more time with the people we click with, and less time with the ones we don't. Practice keeping our opinions to ourself when they have the ability to hurt. Take the time to get to know someone before we form opinions. Maybe go out of our way to speak to someone who we don't know or maybe someone we have formed an opinion about and now realize we know nothing of them beyond that opinion. Take the time to get to know what lies behind the flesh. We are all made up of the same stuff physically. Flesh, blood and bones..the only difference is the structure. Its what fuels the flesh that makes us unique and individual.
Our community is filled with truly wonderful people with huge hearts. I am honored to say I know this from experience.
For the record here..I am speaking generally and not about any one situation or chain of events. So please dont read more into what is here then the intention.
Behind even the most annoying behavior, lies a person crying out for compassion.
Life is 5% situational an 95% the attitude in which we react to those situations.
Go with open minds and joyful hearts and make love, My Friends!
In life, people can't make us feel or do things that we don't allow them to. Our decisions are our own. ie: You can't make me angry , but I can choose to be angry. No one can make me happy but myself, nor is it anyone elses job to do so.
So my advise... Dont give people that power over you...No matter what the situation. Be responsible for your own feelings and actions.
The internet has some great feature called ignore and delete! right click the names of those you don't want to communicate with and block them...delete an unpleasant response..this allows you to continue your communications with the people who you do care about without the fuss of those you don't. *I am still searching for the real life version of this feature*
A few thoughts on virtual interaction. It would be my opinion that alot of us place way too much stock in what gets said online sometimes, and things get blown out of proportion. I often wonder if these were real life situations, how differently would we handle them?? Do we verbalize our opinions of each other in front of large crowds at the grocery?? Do we voice our dislikes about people based on thier physical appearance or our first impressions in the lobby of a movie theatre? Do we judge people and react accordingly without knowing anything more about them then how they look from a distance? When we fight and argue with people, do we do it loud and proud in the middle of a parking lot?? My guess is, not many do. When we hear someone has said something untrue or has said something about us..do we automatically make that person guilty without first going to them privatly to verify it?? Rumors kill alot of potentially wonderful friendships.
I am speaking as someone who is often judged by people who have no clue what I am about. I could come out on front street and lay peoples business bare for the world to see..but what is the point? There would be none, except maybe to appear weak and unable to handle critisism or to demonstrate an inability to not personalize things when I know they aren't true. Or maybe the point would be to try to belittle someone to make myself appear to be a better person then the one offending me? This is not the way I choose to react, no matter how hurtful the words or situation. And I wonder why sometimes people stoop to the level of the person doing the offending?? Don't give anyone that power over you! *sticks and stones....but names will never hurt me* Childhood song... lifetime lesson!
I have friends who have said to me. "Wow you are nothing like I thought." Makes me wonder what it is they thought *lol*
There are alot of us who share our souls online in one form or another. If we took a poll, my guess is that each of us has a different reason for being here, whether it is boredom at work or a lack of oportunity to be out in the real world or whatever. The internet is awesome because it does take away some of the stereotypical happenings of reality and tends to give people the confidence to say things or behave in ways they wouldn't in normal life situations. This is an incredible thing. The shy become confident and the bold become bolder. We do need to remember that behind each name lies a real soul. A person with feelings and a life. A life which can be wonderful or miserable. Chat is a huge melting pot of society, and I personally LOVE that. I have met awesome people that under a world without internet, I never would have had the opportunity to get to know. For that I am thankful !!
Maybe we should spend more time with the people we click with, and less time with the ones we don't. Practice keeping our opinions to ourself when they have the ability to hurt. Take the time to get to know someone before we form opinions. Maybe go out of our way to speak to someone who we don't know or maybe someone we have formed an opinion about and now realize we know nothing of them beyond that opinion. Take the time to get to know what lies behind the flesh. We are all made up of the same stuff physically. Flesh, blood and bones..the only difference is the structure. Its what fuels the flesh that makes us unique and individual.
Our community is filled with truly wonderful people with huge hearts. I am honored to say I know this from experience.
For the record here..I am speaking generally and not about any one situation or chain of events. So please dont read more into what is here then the intention.
Behind even the most annoying behavior, lies a person crying out for compassion.
Life is 5% situational an 95% the attitude in which we react to those situations.
Go with open minds and joyful hearts and make love, My Friends!
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