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It has been a long week.  One foot in front of the other...one moment at a time.  That is how I have learned to plow through this proverbial roller coaster of life. Disappointed to be going on vacation with out my Love. Excited to be getting to go on vacation. Sad to be away from hubs while traveling. Ecstatic to get solid quality face to face with sissy. Frustrated that my health has so much control over my life. Blessed to be alive to face these challenges. Annoyed at work related BS that effects my financial well being and having no control over it. Thankful to have a job. Its a balance....

Almost 1 year ago today I posted this at my Spark home.  Amazing how a year has passed, I still feel these words with every molecule of my being yet I have done nothing to change...until now. I have come to realize that no amount of time can pass to soothe my aching heart. From the day of her diagnosis until this very moment I can not think about my Momma without tears. The overwhelming sadness continually threatens to drown my existence.  I know I have to find a way to push through my days. I know that I have to dig deep and live. I just seem to have forgotten how.  I haven't been here in a very long time. Below is a comment I left 13 days after my Momma found her peace...and 18 months after I lost mine.  ** This page belongs to my beautiful Momma who lost her battle with cancer on Sept 15th 2012. I look back at her blogs here and realize the problems she was having with running were directly related to her un-diagnosis disease.  It seems like only ...

My willpower is as weak as my heart.  I know that in order to strengthen one, I must strengthen the other.  This has not been an easy pill to swallow lately. Truth:  Every night for as many nights as I can remember I lie in bed before falling asleep making empty promises to myself .  Promises that tomorrow I will be strong. Tomorrow I will be in control. Tomorrow is a new day and will be the first day of my recovery from a life of self inflicted damage. These promises used to center around smoking.  I had seen the damage it did to the ones I love.  I had the knowledge to know I was hammering nails into my own coffin.  I spent the best part of 10 years trying to slay that dragon.  Oh, I was eventually successful, but not without years of failed attempts. I recently discovered that I have a heart disease.  Although my heart is physically free of any abnormalities/damage...for some unknown reason it will start fluttering at an uncountable ...

Every day is a good day, but days that I get to giggle with my sissy are better than others.  I truly hate that I can't just jump in my car and go have lunch with her.  Talking on the phone is fine, but it is no substitute for face time.  For now, it will have to do.  Next sissy adventure in about 6 weeks.  Unless that lottery thing pans out before then. It's summertime. And damn is it HOT!  Heat advisory every day this week.  I can literally hear my A/C unit moaning outside trying to keep up with the thermostat. Current temp was 97, but the feels like temp is 108.  Seriously!  I have yet to get to the beach.  I am a bit worried about my current ability to sustain the heat for the length of time I am usually there.  The heat, or should I say my body trying to fight against the heat, seems to rev up my ticker.  Not such a good thing these days. I will not let that stop me though, I need some sand between my toes for real. ...

  2 large chicken breast 1 can crescent rolls 1 10.5 oz. can cream of chicken soup 1/2 soup can of broth (use what the chicken cooked in) 1/2 soup can milk 1 T. all purpose flour 6 oz. shredded sharp cheddar cheese pinch of salt and pepper  NOTE: The 1/2 soup can is using the empty can of cream of chicken soup to measure. Place the chicken in a pot and cover with water, bring to a boil, reduce the heat to medium and cook till chicken is cooked through. Remove chicken (save broth). When cooled enough to handle remove the chicken from the bone and shred, set aside. Whisk together the soup, broth, milk, flour, salt and pepper. Unroll the crescent dough and separate into the triangles. Place a little cheese over the dough and at the larger end place a good heaping of the chicken. Roll up and place in a 9x13 casserole dish. Repeat with remaining. Once all are in the dish, pour the soup mix around each one and then drizzle a little over the tops (not too much). Bake in a 375 degree ...

Follow my blog with Bloglovin I sometimes find I'm drifting Through this life without effect; I often wonder if I'm truly Worth what I've been blessed. I search through days that have been hard, To try to understand, The many trials that I have known, The life that I have had. You see me in my daily grind, So confident and strong; Yet when I am alone, I question Just where I belong. I often try too hard I find, To analyze and guess, To scrutinize, investigate My life I will confess. For somewhere deeper, there must be Some meaning to this life, Some way to make a difference, Give a reason for this strife. Is there some hidden meaning? Some agenda to be found? A greater purpose waiting If I care to hang around? It teases and it taunts me, Always slightly out of sight; A hazy vision out of reach, Where darkness hides the light. I struggle to bring clarity To what awaits me there, And yet this weak illusion Always fades b...